Leaving the Outhouse

Changing plans is sometime the easiest hard thing to do. When a person decides they are done with a mediocre life that had surrounded them, the only thing to do is be drastic. Now, in my book, drastic and dramatic are twins! Being from Texas – you are raised on the philosophy: “GO BIG, OR GO HOME!” Well, I always go big; but this past weekend, I was able to do both, I went home…which was perfect, but I was also able to go BIG.

Seeing my family, the baby, and just being under the Texas sky were like an airbag to the face, I feel like I was able to see clearly, as well as have a little bit of Southern sense knocked into me.

Having been in New York for the past three years, and living life – you sometime get caught up in the drama of a situation – or think that it comes with the territory. Fuck that… New York is and will always be New York, but I’m out! Officially throwing the deuces!

I came to here to get my graduate degree, and now I’m done… too bad the recession came, and turned the New York job market into a citywide outhouse! No jobs anywhere! The already saturated job market is even shittier because all of the once-working professionals that were laid off are now looking to get back in on the job action. So for a new graduate like me and so many of my friends – it is virtually impossible to even get an interview.

I have been asking myself since May 2008 why stay in a city where 1) there are not “real” jobs, 2) your current job doesn’t want to offer full-time and consistently sends you home early (totally jacking up your money) and 3) is overrated? You know…I made up reasons to trick myself into staying, until now… there is no reason to stay…point blank….period. Not when I have a loving, amazingly-supportive family, a great home state, and a job market that is thriving.

I must say I will miss all of the remarkable people I was blessed enough to call friends when I lived here… this is by no means a goodbye, but a “I gotta go make my money” break. I will obviously, be back to visit, or possibly to move back when the timing is better, and there are actual jobs available.

My boo, E.E. Cummings, told me just the other day:

“I'm living so far beyond my income that we may almost be said to be living apart.”